Have you ever googled parenting hacks? What about books to help you parent “correctly”? In almost 17 years of parenting, I sure have. I also have had to call poison control THREE times in one week! I am sure at least once in life your toddler or young child will “accidentally” call 911, resulting in cops coming to your house to assess the situation. Or maybe you have had to tell your child the tooth fairy got blown away in the Wyoming wind and that's why they forgot to leave money under their pillow! All these lovely scenarios come with the greatest feat of life called parenting. I would love to say that parenting is all roses and butterflies, and that it's smooth sailing. That is how I imagined it growing up. I would have the kid, feed it and POOF…it’s grown up and on its own. As much truth as there is to that idea of it going that fast, it is far from the reality that comes with parenting. I honestly do not think anyone is ever prepared for the in between. The ups and down, the turnarounds and all arounds of having children. Parenting is HARD! There isn't one good way to get through it or navigate the unknown. And all those parenting books seem to be full of lies when it comes to what to do! Parenting is complicated, and gives you every emotion known to mankind, even ones you didn't know existed. You wait 9 long months to have this sweet little bundle of joy in your arms, wanting to cuddle you and easily get comforted when you rock them. Then one day, years from that moment you are faced with the teenager that all of a sudden looks like a young adult and you find yourself asking “why”, “how” and “when” did this happen! I swear the sweet years FLY by. But the hard days, turn into long grueling nights of wondering where you went wrong. The tough days seem to drag on. And the easy days seem to be forgotten. You are the last person in the world your child seems to want anything to do with and every little thing you say or do is wrong. As hard as it can be, it's always good to try and remember the good days. Your child at any given moment has NEVER been this age. It is important to remember that the uncharted territory of parenting in this moment is all new, just like the exact moment of their childhood is new to them as well. They have never been here. But we have. As their parents we have grown through all these ages that we get to help our own children through. I have heard time and time again people say they won't let their children go through what they themselves did and want to make it “better’. To us it seems common sense that you don’t put aluminum foil in the microwave, you make sure you don’t over boil the water, you make sure to brush your teeth EVERY day and shower regularly. But how do our kids know this? These are all things we LEARNED. Did we do it the hard way? Or did our parents have to teach us these things? More than likely it was a mixture of both. It is possible you might learn something new while growing with your child as well. My advice as a parent is simple really. Just let it ride. Let go of all those expectations you ever thought parenting would look like. Don’t worry if it doesn’t look textbook perfect. You and your child will know what you need to do. I can guarantee that parenting is the toughest yet most rewarding thing you could ever do. On hard days, try and remember it won't be like this forever. Remember the good days and how far you've come as a parent. Give yourself grace and understand no one is perfect. Also know that what other people do for their parenting, might not work in your situation. Everyone is different. Which means that every single person learns or grows differently. The cool thing about parenting is, as long as you are doing your best, that's just how you do it. Your children have to learn certain things on their own, and it is our responsibility as their parents to be there for them. Sure maybe you don’t want them to make mistakes like you yourself did. Unfortunately, it doesn't always work that way. Because sometimes we have to fall before we can rise.
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Yesterday was International Bereaved Mother’s Day. In a million years I never thought I would be a part of this group, but here I sit, nearly 9 years into my bereavement of my own daughter. And my grief is still as real today as it was all those years ago when Olivia took her last breath. You would think that with time, the grief has gotten easier. Or less heavy. But in reality, it never really lifts. It just changes. Sometimes it’s a little bit lighter, but other times it comes in like a wave, and without warning, it knocks me back down like a tidal wave. When Olivia first died I went into shock. I was there. I knew she had died. But I simply couldn’t allow myself to feel the magnitude of losing her because it would have overtaken me. So instead of grieving, I went into survival mode. I was determined to love the rest of my family well, and to try to make all of them okay so that our family could survive the loss. That survival mode went on for years. I would continually live almost in a dream, trying to make everyone else okay, while never actually dealing with my own grief or my own feelings of loss. It wasn’t until I met and married my now husband that I finally had the space, love and support I needed to deal with the loss of my daughter. And let me tell you, it wasn’t pretty! Thank God he’s a patient man who was determined to put the pieces back together for the three very broken people he found in my children and I. For about a year the grief and the brokenness were almost too much. I was exhausted! I felt like I was drowning in it, and I didn’t know if I would ever be able to come up for air. But with a lot of patience, prayer, and time spent healing, it did get better. And I can say now that I live in a much more real place with my grief, and I no longer try to stifle it like I did in my earlier years. Today I am 8.5 years into this loss of a lifetime. And I am still actively grieving. I miss Olivia every single day. And I am still dealing with all the ways her loss has affected me and the other members of my family. I won’t pretend for a moment to have all the answers for how to live successfully with grief. There are days when I think I’m doing okay, and there are days when I still need to spend a day or two in bed just allowing myself to feel the weight of this huge loss and all the sadness that goes with it. There are also days when I don’t have the luxury of getting to do that, and instead those around me sometimes pay the price for the tornado of grief that’s spinning around inside of me. I wish I had a lot more than 20 months with my daughter. I wish I had a 10 year old girl right now who was growing up into a beautiful young woman. I miss having my mini-me and I'm sad for all the experiences I will never get the chance to share with her. Today and every day, take the time to pray for and love on the bereaved mothers around you. You may not even realize some of them exist. You may think they are so strong from all they’ve experienced that they don’t actually need you. But I am here to tell you, they do. They just won’t be very likely to ask for it. They have probably learned a lot about suffering in silence and solidarity because it’s a loss unlike any other. But they shouldn’t have to keep living like that. Give them a hug. Invite them to coffee. Take a little time to learn about the child they lost and maybe even a little bit about the woman they were before they became a bereaved mother. You have no idea how much that would mean for both of you.
Categories All The Patient Advocacy Team is hitting the road this summer! I am excited to have Eileen Ford - our new Foundation Assistant - on board as we continue to reach out to individual counties in Wyoming. In May we get a few days in Gillette. June sees us in Lander and Riverton. And Sheridan is in the works! It is shaping up to be a fun summer with more events to come. Why do we travel? The Patient Advocacy Program is a free, state-wide support opportunity for families who have a child with a chronic illness or medically complex condition. That can be anything from a premature birth to asthma to a rare genetic disease to cancer. There is no specific diagnosis needed to qualify for support. Our families come from the four corners of the state and everywhere in between. It makes a big difference to them to know what is local, even if that means within their county or neighboring counties. Their needs can be as varied as the diagnosis: help finding an affordable cell phone and plan, gas cards to get to out of state appointments, tax assistance, affordable housing, groceries, respite care, funeral costs, school support, sibling care and summer camps, rent assistance. These are just a few examples from the past month that have come up. In order to make sure that we have plenty of resources and good connections within each community, we do our research from homebase in Casper and then go to where the families are to shore up our relationships with community partners and see those we’re supporting face to face whenever possible! Get the Word Out The world we live in is stressful, no arguments there. Fact: as more stressors get added to our plates, the harder it is to manage. Another fact: that doesn’t make a value judgment on our humanity, just proves our humanity. If you or someone you know has a child diagnosed with a medically complex condition or a chronic illness, those stressors add up quickly and some things just cannot get done because there isn’t enough of you or them to do it. We want to make sure that every family that needs support receives it. It is a win-win for us when we know what exists in communities and that communities know we exist. For a real life example, knowing about respite providers is not exactly in every parent’s or guardian’s wheelhouse. But when they need a break because they spend most waking hours caring the energy to pinpoint that help often doesn’t exist. In this situation, it took myself and another organization that I referred the family over to for other support that eventually made connections to two wonderful respite providers possible. That saying “it takes a village to raise a child” explodes into greater depth of meaning when we can all work together for the family’s good. Still Available on the Go While we may be out and about in different counties or other events, we are still “here!” If you or someone you know lives in our great state of Wyoming and has a child diagnosed with chronic illness or a medically complex condition, please contact us! Our website (www.oliviacaldwellfoundation.org) has a direct link to my email (katelin@oliviacaldwellfoundation.org), you can call at 307-333-1273 or find us on Facebook to send a DM!
Categories All Today's youth are under pressure — now more than ever — in schools, in our communities, and online. How many times have you whispered to yourself, “I’m so glad social media wasn’t around when we were kids”. Most of us seemed to live in a simpler time when we were kids. We could go outside to play and wander the streets without worry, we weren’t attached to a phone (unless you were one of the lucky ones with your own personal phone line in your room), there was no evidence of something we did that would be blasted all over the internet. I take a look at kids these days who seem to grow up too fast and are addicted to technology and it makes my heart ache. Every time I hear a child under 12 talk about a Tik Tok video or when they have to practice a school shooting drill at school- it reminds me that times are definitely different and as parents we have to learn how to support our kids through something we don’t have experience with. There are so many different types of social pressure and external interruptions that we have to figure out how to support our kids through. So how do we do it all? Three pieces of advice I have are:
Trusting Your Instincts: As much as we were able to choose our kids’ friends and environment when they were little, as soon as they go to school you no longer have a say as to who they make friends with. From my experience, that sometimes means your kids are exposed to a completely different set of family values and rules. My kids have learned more things this year that I was unprepared to deal with but had to learn how to navigate. If you have that nagging feeling that your child is being picked on, is acting more sensitive, or even talking in a way you’ve never taught them- listen to it! You know your child best, so if something’s off make sure you trust those instincts and figure out how you want to handle the situation. This leads me to my next piece of advice, open communication. Keep Open Lines of Communication: This one is so important in my opinion. We just moved to a new town this year and therefore the kids started a new school. New school means new kids that I don’t really know. They have learned so many things this year that I frankly didn’t even know kids under 10 years old knew. We don’t let our kids watch YouTube, Tik Tok or even have their own phones because in my opinion they are too young but they were starting to talk about things they had seen on these channels so I knew they were still gaining access elsewhere. I had to sit my kids down and talk with them about why we didn’t let them watch these things and even when they weren’t home, it wasn’t okay for them to watch either. We had to lay down the truth that the internet can be a scary place for kids to be and it’s not appropriate for them to be on certain unmonitored channels. Every time they go over to a friend’s house where I know the rules are more lax, we have to remind them about our rules and that they need to be followed even when they are elsewhere. Keeping the lines of communication open with other adults in your kids life is equally as important. When one of my kids was struggling at school with behavioral issues I wasn’t given much information and had to initiate conversations with the teacher and counselor to see how I could help from my end. If your values don’t align with your child’s teacher, their friends’ parents or whoever, make sure to share and openly communicate your values and how you would appreciate some consistency so your child doesn’t get confused by all the different sets of rules. Lean On A Friend: This has probably been the most helpful thing as a parent thus far. If you have a friend whose kids are just a little older than yours, they have probably already dealt with the situations you are about to stumble upon. Lean on them for advice on how they handle this new world our kids are growing up in. It’s a wild new world our kids are growing up in so any advice from someone who’s already been through it is extremely helpful. If you feel like your child’s mental health is affected at all please know you have support available. Helping your child find the support they need to navigate through their struggles will help them flourish into thriving adults. The Olivia Caldwell Foundation is proud to offer a mental health support group for parents and caregivers of children with a mental health concern. Take advantage of this free resource to see how you can support them. Find out more information on our website http://www.oliviacaldwellfoundation.org/support-groups.html
Categories All I feel as adults we have all had something at some point in our life that has made us feel some sort of guilt. Whether it be the piece of candy you stole from the dollar store when you were 6, or the lack of time spent with a loved one only for it to end before you had the chance. Guilt is such a hard pill to swallow. Because once it hits, it can consume you and hold you hostage. It can creep on you when you least expect it. It is a dirty little devil. A couple years ago, my life as a mother changed forever. My son was diagnosed with a rare cancer disorder that showed up after an appendix rupture. I can remember the doctor's face, the tears that followed those words and the look of fear on my oldest son's face. I don't think that kind of news ever really sits right. How could it? My entire knowledge of the word ‘cancer’ was horrifying. I have lost many good people in my life to cancer and everything I had ever known about it was just plain bad. The real picture of my son’s diagnosis isn't black and white. It is still one of the most rare forms to have and the knowledge behind it as a whole is still in the process of lots of research. Especially since it is even more rare for a pediatric case. He will forever have it. He will continue to be tested his whole life to watch for growths and complications from it. When there are no growths to be found, he is for the most part healthy. You think I would be ecstatic at this fact. Which I am. But this is the point my friends where that fun little feeling of guilt creeps up. There is a saying that “things could be worse.” And man could they be. My son could have a death door knocking condition, going through horrid treatments and spending his days in the hospital away from everything he knows. But he isn't. Aside from the routine testing and quarterly doctor visits, he gets to live his teenage life tormenting his siblings and testing every last parent button I have. As a mother, I am beyond grateful for where we are at with his cancer. He is currently healthy and has minimal complications. And when I start to overthink, I start to feel the guilt set in. What did I do to deserve the ladder of this experience? Why him, why me and why not all others? I feel a good portion of guilt about this almost everyday. Maybe it is part of the grieving process. I am not sure. But all I know is the weight of the guilt some days can outweigh the fact that my son is ok. I have many friends that have lost their children to cancer or other illnesses. Young lives taken before they really were able to live a full life. That just sits heavy on my heart. How can I talk about my son being healthy when others weren't lucky? How can I sit back and be Ok with the fact if there was a good diagnosis, this is probably it. Am I happy about the diagnosis? Absolutely not. I wish everyday that it wasn't a thing. I wish life was like it was before the diagnosis. But it's not. So why would I allow myself to have these guilty feelings? I shouldn’t. Every situation is different. Every diagnosis is different. Every person is different. I have spent so much of my time not allowing myself to be upset and bothered by my son's diagnosis because “it could be worse.” Just because it isn’t as critical in the moment as others have been, doesn't mean it is any less real or any less worthy of my true feelings. I share this story because my hope is to enlighten others about a few of the emotions that come as a parent with a child that has a complex medical condition. What it's like to live in a not so perfect world. I want others to know that their feelings are valid and they aren't alone. But I mostly want them to know that it's ok to feel relieved at any sight of hope, even if it isn't fair to those around you or you don't think you deserve it. Your emotions about your current situation do not need to diminish because others had a not so happy outcome. Your current situation is just as important as others even if it doesn't seem like it. It is time to let go of the guilt you feel because your situation is different or “better” from others. Here are a few ways you can let go of that guilt. Allow yourself to feel just how you need to heal or deal. Allow it to be ok even if it feels like you have no right to feel that way. Give yourself grace. Stay out of your head. Don't be afraid to talk about it. Don’t be afraid to get help if you have trouble sorting through the emotions.
If you need additional support you can also always reach out to our Patient Advocate, Katelin, who would be happy to be a helping hand and to connect you to any help you might need to get through this.
Categories All I have a love-hate relationship with Springtime. I love the increased sunshine and daylight hours and the first promises that summer is on the horizon. I hate it though when the weather changes on a dime and we are suddenly freezing cold under piles of snow after a few days of warmth and sunshine. The ups and downs can seriously mess with my mental well being! This Spring has been extra hard and it has only just begun. The month of March has been filled with a lot of disappointment, loss, and countless things going horribly wrong that I have no control over. It’s been really difficult and I’ve struggled with the fact that I am anything but okay right now. In the past when life was really hard I would slap on a fake smile and overcompensate by throwing myself into something (a project, holiday preparation, etc) to try and distract myself from really feeling the emotions and the heartbreak. I would wear that fake smile like a badge of honor, willing myself to just be okay. But I wasn’t okay then and I’m really not okay now either. But that is okay too! What I’ve learned through all of these years and all the hard roads I’ve had to walk in my nearly 35 years of life is that it is actually more than okay to not be okay sometimes. That was a lesson I had to learn the hard way when I finally began to process the loss of my daughter and other really difficult life circumstances many years ago. It wasn’t until I was very near a mental breakdown before I began to bask in the freedom of that knowledge, but thankfully it isn’t a lesson I have forgotten just yet. I could beat myself up for struggling right now. I could slap on that fake smile and pretend that all is wonderful right now, but I know that is not what is best for me both now or in the future. So instead I am taking my old lessons and doing what I need to do to deal with this season now. If this is you and this season is really hard, acknowledge how you are feeling and the why behind it. Cry if you need to, but let it out! When you don’t and you hold onto something and bury it deep inside is when you finally reach a point of explosion. And those explosions can be much harder to come back from. When I am in a season of grief or heartbreak I have learned to stop and spend some time with it. I do some soul searching and understand where the sadness is coming from. And then I let it out. I pray. I journal. I cry. I share my feelings with some treasured people, and I just rest. And you know what? Nine times out of 10 I wake up stronger and less consumed by grief the next day. I’ve managed my grief and my feelings instead of letting them handle me. It doesn’t mean all the sadness is gone after one day, and sometimes it’s a process that lasts a few weeks or even a month, but I know if I stick with it, over time I will find my joy and my peace again. Yes, I have suffered a lot of loss in my life. And yes, right now I have stressors coming at me from just about every direction. But I am going to lift my eyes and look up, count my blessings, and work on getting a real smile on my face. And you, my friend, can do the same, even if it feels impossible right now.
Categories All I’m going to preface this by saying I am not a tax expert and you should always talk to your tax professional for clarification and advice. Now, having said that, I do want to add some credibility to why I’m writing on this topic. I have been involved with nonprofit organizations for a combined six years and I truly believe that nonprofits are the backbone of this world and have an impact that can’t be matched. I am also a business owner and know the importance of tax write-offs to help my one-woman show come tax time. Nonprofits like the Olivia Caldwell Foundation rely on grants and donations from generous individuals, businesses and foundations. The beauty of getting to partner with people whose values align with the work we do at OCF, is that the relationship is mutually beneficial. Donors get to be a part of a movement that combines the good of a community to make a greater impact than any one individual can do alone. The nonprofit is therefore able to work on fulfilling their mission with a team of passionate supporters on their side. Whether you choose to make a large donation at the end of the year to help your bottom line on taxes or you prefer the consistency of an automatic monthly contribution- donors are putting their hard earned money back into causes that they care about. When it comes to tax deductible giving to a nonprofit organization there are a few things to take into consideration.
As a business owner, donating either goods, services or money to nonprofit organizations helps in so many ways. Here’s a few:
Talk with your tax professional before you submit your taxes this year and see how your donations from the previous year can be used and make sure to come up with a plan for giving in 2022 to take advantage of the tax benefits. Resources from Tax Deductible Donations: Rules of Giving to Charity - NerdWallet
If you have a child with a chronic illness or medically complex condition, you may find that your child’s care goes well beyond the usual visits to the doctors office. And if you live in rural Wyoming and have specialty care needs, that means you get to travel for that care. So when it’s all said and done, your kiddo with those extra medical needs and care will have a larger team on his or her side. That can be a little overwhelming, so I’d like to take this chance to share some good news about one person who will likely be a part of your child’s care team. In honor of National Social Workers month this March, social workers are our spotlight team members! The Social Worker The clinical social worker employed by a hospital can be such an important piece of your care. Sometimes we may have this idea that a social worker is scary and only shows up when our kids are taken away for some sort of neglect or abuse, but actually they are there to really care for you and your child! Let me share some of the great ways these folks can help you take the next steps in your child’s medical journey. 1) Counseling As a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), these are professional counselors, trained in various ways to help you and your child process through a particular struggle in life. That could be the news of a diagnosis, grief from loss, trauma from an accident and more. They can help you, individually and as a family begin the process of understanding what you have experienced and share how you can overcome it. They can help answer questions about a treatment process or what can be expected with a certain diagnosis in a language that you and your child can understand, especially those who work in pediatric-specific areas. This is such an awesome and important opportunity for your family to strengthen your hearts and minds as you move forward with whatever the future holds. 2) Insurance Gurus Whether it was an accident, a premature birth, or a chronic illness that has been in the cards for a while now, as adults we always want our children to have the best care - and be able to afford it. That “and” can be a pretty big hurdle to overcome. Social workers are well versed with insurance company’s policies and they can help you work through how that “and” can be a possibility. They can also help find other support that you need from organizations that have funds to cover specific things. It’s not easy to ask for help, especially financially. And if we want to help care for our children today, we need to take steps to make sure that we can also take care of them tomorrow. Social workers are great at helping you see the path to do that. 3) Going Home Social workers are a big part of the process to get your family home in a way that will help you succeed. If there are barriers in care or equipment, they can help make sure you have what you need to keep your child on the right track. That can be anything from oxygen to walkers! They can also help to make sure your child’s follow up care is mapped out. They can also help you get connected to other resources at home. Partners We are grateful for the whole team that cares for our Wyoming children! In the Patient Advocacy Program, I get to work alongside social workers and those within their team to be able to help connect families to some of those local resources and support services that they need. I like being able to encourage our families to reach out to their social worker when their child has an appointment with their specialist when I know of needs they can support. Yes, part of the social workers job is to ensure that our children are safe. And a big part of how they ensure that is happening is by caring for us - parents - while we take care of them! Be sure to take advantage of this important person on your care team, as you walk with your child through their medical journey! If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to ask - you can reach me at (307) 333-1273 or katelin@oliviacaldwellfoundation.org
Categories All Nutrition. The huge elephant in the room that nobody wants to discuss when really it needs to be. I know, I know. Another article on why we need to eat our fruits and vegetables, drink water and get the right amount of protein. Trust me, if cake and diet soda were in the nutritional wheel as a staple, I would be the first in line to be healthy. Unfortunately, it does not work that way. In order to live a healthy, long life, we really do need to make sure our nutrition is somewhat on point. March is National Nutrition Month! So what better time than to go over some key factors as to why our nutrition is SO important. Nutrition can vary from person to person because of age, health status, schedule and other defining factors. It is always a good idea to consult your health care provider before starting any special nutrition plan. Not all nutritional eating plans work for everyone. We all know the basics of the nutrition wheel. Vegetables, fruits, whole grains, dairy, and proteins. But we don’t always know why we need to follow these recommendations. Proper nutrition can lead to healthier lifestyles all across the board. Nutrition is medicine. No, it can’t solve every issue, but it can resolve symptoms a huge percentage of chronic illnesses people experience. Nearly half of all Americans have at least one chronic illness. For people with chronic diseases, healthy eating can help manage these conditions and prevent complications. Good nutrition is the key to good mental and physical health. Eating a balanced diet is an important part of good health for everyone. The kind and amount of food you eat affects the way you feel and how your body works. People with healthy eating patterns live longer and are at lower risk for serious health problems such as heart disease, type 2 diabetes, and obesity. Allowing yourself to fuel your body with the right nutrients can help improve your ability to fight the common cold or nasty virus that is circulating around. Being properly fueled can help you recover from injury as well. You may not think that proper nutrition helps with mental health, but studies show that it in fact plays a huge role. You could find yourself having more energy, and in better moods. A healthy diet promotes a healthy gut, which communicates with the brain through what is known as the gut-brain axis. Microbes in the gut produce neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine, which regulate our mood and emotions, and the gut microbiome has been implicated in mental health outcomes. Studies have even found that healthy diets can help with symptoms of depression and anxiety. Here are 10 small ways you can improve your nutrition.
If you are looking for more information on proper nutrition check out any of the following websites: the American Heart Association, American Cancer Society and the American Diabetes Association.
Categories All This past Saturday marked 10 years since I first became a mom. On that beautiful day my twins, Wyatt & Olivia, entered this world and my life changed forever. It’s really amazing to think how much all of our lives have changed since then. Ten years ago was a scary day in many ways. I had developed preeclampsia and had gotten incredibly sick. I was life-flighted a few days earlier to Denver in the hopes that with treatment my body could hang on just a little bit longer so I could get closer to my April due date. But on the morning of February 19, 2012 I woke up feeling like someone had put a pile of bricks on my chest. My doctor ordered an X-ray to take a look at my chest. It turned out that I had developed pulmonary edema and just like that I was whisked away to an emergency c-section and told that would be the day my twins would be born. Now 10 years later it is hard to believe how much life has changed. Olivia fought a big battle with brain cancer and would only celebrate one birthday on earth with her family before God called her home. Wyatt continues to fight a battle with diabetes, but is still living a healthy and happy life with his family. Their birthday is now a really bittersweet day for me each year. It is so sweet because I still have a wonderful 10 year old boy to celebrate. It is bitter because I am always missing my little girl. On this bittersweet day I have struggled to find a balance between the grief that fills my heart on that day and the joy I have in my little boy. For many years we would have a special cake for Olivia at our birthday parties and a balloon to represent her. Other years we’ve made the party all about Wyatt and just taken time to remember Olivia at home as a family. This year though Wyatt wanted to do something a little different. He asked if we could have special pancakes in the morning with an “O” drawn on each one with chocolate syrup. And so that’s exactly what we did! But then the rest of the day was all about celebrating our sweet Wyatt. He chose a dinner destination for our family, selected the perfect lego set from Target, and excitedly planned his birthday party for a few days later. It was really wonderful to see him find some real joy in his birthday. It’s heartbreaking to think that just as February 19th is bittersweet for me each year, it is equally as bittersweet for Wyatt. He is always missing his sister and at times in his young life has struggled to really celebrate his own birthday because of the grief he feels. This year my husband and I were determined more than ever to make sure Wyatt felt celebrated, joyful and completely happy on his birthday. We always want him to know just how much we celebrate the wonderful young man he is becoming! I don't believe there is a one-size-fits-all for celebrating birthdays after a child passes away. If Olivia hadn’t been a twin I imagine I would celebrate her birthday completely differently. However, that day is just as much Wyatt’s birthday as it is hers and I never want him to grow up thinking that he isn’t worth celebrating! Do you have a special tradition in your family to celebrate the birthday of a child or other loved one who is no longer with you? I would love to hear about it! You can comment on this post or email katie@oliviacaldwellfoundation.org.
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